1:18:02
You can go if you want,
I don't care, but I'm not gonna go.
1:18:05
I am not an alcoholic
and I refuse to say I am.
1:18:09
I refuse to ask for help in something...
1:18:11
...that is just a matter
of self-respect and willpower.
1:18:15
I refuse to get up in front of a bunch
of people and degrade myself.
1:18:20
I know I can't drink,
because it gets the best of me, so I...
1:18:24
I will just use my willpower and not drink,
and that's the end of it.
1:18:44
- We got time for a cigarette.
- You nervous?
1:18:47
No, I...
1:18:49
- Button came off my jacket.
- Leave it open.
1:18:51
- Yeah.
- Oh, yeah. Here.
1:18:56
I used to be a pretty fancy dresser.
1:18:59
I wouldn't have been caught dead
with a button off me.
1:19:03
- You're scared?
- No, this is natural complexion. Pale green.
1:19:07
- Nobody will notice. Come on.
- Well, wait a minute. Just, you know...
1:19:12
You know, you are turning pale green.
Now, will you come on?
1:19:17
It's facing all the people.
1:19:19
- You sure?
- What do you mean?
1:19:21
- It's facing yourself, isn't it?
- I don't mind sharing my life.
1:19:25
Even the most embarrassing parts of it.
That's not what bothers me.
1:19:29
The idea of standing in front
of everyone and saying:
1:19:32
- "I am an alcoholic. "
- Are you?
1:19:35
- Yes, I-
- So are we¡Now, you've heard us...
1:19:37
...night after night saying, "I am an
alcoholic. " It's a big step forward.
1:19:41
But it's funny that four months ago
you saw me in the violent ward...
1:19:45
...and you told me about AA.
I went to the meetings, I listened...
1:19:48
...and I've been sober ever since. Kirs
has been sober too, just as sober as I am.
1:19:53
She has never said, "I am an alcoholic. "
She hasn't been near a meeting.
1:19:58
She claims she
can do it on willpower alone.