1:09:04
You wished the baby would be dead.
1:09:11
You wished for a dead baby.
1:09:17
The delivery was difficult and long.
1:09:21
You were in agony for days. Finally
the baby was delivered with forceps.
1:09:27
You looked with disgust and terror
at your squealing baby and whispered:
1:09:32
''Can't you die soon? Can't you die?''
1:09:36
The boy screamed day and night.
And you hated him.
1:09:42
You were scared,
you had a bad conscience.
1:09:47
Finally the boy was taken care of
by relatives and a nanny.
1:09:51
You could get up from your sickbed
and return to the theatre.
1:09:57
But the suffering wasn't over.
1:10:01
The boy was gripped by a massive
and unfathomable love for his mother.
1:10:07
You defend yourself in despair.
You feel you can't return it.
1:10:12
So you try, and you try...
1:10:16
But there are only cruel and clumsy
meetings between you.
1:10:20
You can't do it.
You're cold and indifferent.
1:10:25
He looks at you.
He loves you and he's so gentle.
1:10:30
You want to hit him
because he doesn't leave you alone.
1:10:34
You think he's disgusting
with his thick mouth and ugly body.
1:10:39
His moist and pleading eyes.
He's disgusting and you're scared.
1:10:51
No!
1:10:54
l'm not like you. l don't feel like you.
1:10:59
l'm Sister Alma,
l'm just here to help you.