The Odd Couple
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:50:00
I'm going to kill you.
That's the irony of it.

:50:05
What's wrong, Oscar?
:50:06
There's something wrong
with this system.

:50:08
I don't think that
two single men living alone

:50:10
in a big eight-room
apartment

:50:12
should have a cleaner house
than my mother.

:50:14
Wait. What are you
talking about?

:50:16
I didn't say
you have to.

:50:17
You don't have to
clean up.

:50:18
What you do is worse.
:50:20
You're always
hanging up my towels.

:50:21
You follow me around
with an ashtray.

:50:23
Last night, I found you
in the kitchen

:50:24
washing the floor,
shaking your head,

:50:26
and moaning,
"Footprints, footprints."

:50:27
I didn't say
they were yours.

:50:29
Well, they were mine,
damn it.

:50:30
I have feet,
and they make prints.

:50:32
Should I climb
across the cabinets?

:50:34
No! Just walk
on the floor!

:50:36
Well, I appreciate that.
I really do.

:50:38
I'm only trying to keep
this place livable.

:50:40
I didn't know
I irritated you that much.

:50:42
Leave my pictures alone.
:50:43
I was just trying
to even them up.

:50:46
I want them uneven.
They're my pictures.

:50:48
Even up
your own pictures.

:50:50
I was wondering
how long it would take.

:50:53
How long what
would take?

:50:55
Before I got
on your nerves.

:50:57
I didn't say
you got on my nerves.

:51:00
Please don't do that.
:51:01
Same thing. You said
I irritated you.

:51:03
No. You said you irritated me.
I didn't say it.

:51:05
What did you say?
:51:07
I don't remember.
What's the difference?

:51:08
No difference.
I was just repeating

:51:10
what I thought
you said.

:51:11
Don't repeat what
you thought I said!

:51:13
Repeat what I said!
:51:14
My God,
that's irritating!

:51:16
See? You did say it.
:51:17
I don't believe
this whole conversation.

:51:21
Oscar, I'm sorry.
:51:23
I don't know
what's wrong with me.

:51:25
And don't pout.
:51:26
You want to fight,
we'll fight, but don't pout.

:51:28
Fighting...I win.
Pouting...you win.

:51:29
You're right.
You're right.

:51:31
Everything you say about me
is absolutely right.

:51:33
Don't give in
so easily.

:51:35
I'm not always right.
Sometimes you're right.

:51:37
You're right. I do that.
I always figure I'm wrong.

:51:39
Only this time,
you are wrong and I'm right.

:51:41
Oh, leave me alone.
:51:43
And don't sulk.
That's the same as pouting.

:51:46
I know, I know. Oh, damn me.
:51:49
Why can't I do just
one lousy thing right?

:51:56
Why didn't you throw it?
:51:58
I almost did. Sometimes I get
so insane with myself.


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