:58:00
But that wasn't clear to me.
:58:03
We were to have a mutual secret.
:58:08
l slowly wanted to take him away
from his wife and make him mine.
:58:14
l saw that terrible coldness
in his marriage...
:58:18
and was somewhat obsessed with
the idea that he would turn to me.
:58:24
That he would
discover me at long last.
:58:27
That he would realize
that l secretly loved him.
:58:33
Emotionally,
Peter was a dying man.
:58:38
The way one can die of hunger,
thirst or loss of blood.
:58:43
l knew that l could save him.
:58:47
And l wished l was
the one he was seeking.
:58:50
Seeking to be close to me.
:59:00
l don't think l'm wrong.
:59:03
People like me have
a feeling for such things.
:59:07
Perhaps everything
l've told you isn't the truth either.
:59:12
There are certain clever people
who say we're blind.
:59:16
That our movements are preordained.
That we've been pledged...
:59:21
or violated since birth.
:59:26
But that doesn't make
the slightest difference.
:59:30
Don't you agree?
:59:33
Peter Egermann wrote a letter to
Professor Jensen. lt was never sent.
:59:38
Dear Mogens...
:59:40
what l'm going to describe
isn't a dream in the usual sense.
:59:44
Although l experienced this under
the influence of pills and alcohol.
:59:51
This experience seemed
more real and horrible...
:59:54
than the banal reality of everyday
life. But that's all trivial.