:18:01
	Welcome to Der Wienerschnitzel.
May I take your order, please?
:18:03
	Yeah. I want...
:18:08
	You want whale sperm with that?
:18:12
	I hate the Sixties,
I hate school...
:18:14
	I hate principals.
:18:16
	I hate vice principals...
:18:18
	but my true, pure,
refined hatred...
:18:22
	is reserved
for guidance counselors.
:18:25
	Happy Harry just happens
to have in his very hands...
:18:28
	a copy of a memo written
by one Mr. David Deaver...
:18:31
	guidance counselor
extraordinaire...
:18:33
	to one Miss Loretta Creswood,
high school principal.
:18:37
	"I find Cheryl unremorseful...
:18:39
	"about her unfortunate
condition."
:18:42
	Bastard can't even say
she's knocked up.
:18:46
	What channel?
:18:49
	"And she's unwilling
to minimize its effect...
:18:52
	"on the morale
of the student population."
:18:55
	Guidance counselors.
:18:56
	lf they knew anything
about career moves...
:18:58
	would they have ended up
as guidance counselors?
:19:01
	What do you say
we call Deaver up, huh?
:19:03
	Hard Harry
just happens to have...
:19:06
	the home phone numbers
of every employee...
:19:08
	of the Paradise Hills
school commission.
:19:13
	Here we go.
:19:14
	There you are, Mr. Deavski.
:19:21
	Deaver residence.
:19:22
	David Deaver speaking.
:19:23
	Hey, this is WKPS.
You're live.
:19:25
	We're doing a piece
on high schools.
:19:27
	We understand that you're
a guidance counselor.
:19:29
	I'm head of guidance...
:19:31
	here at Hubert Humphrey High
in Paradise Hills, Arizona.
:19:34
	l've been here seven years.
:19:37
	Could you tell us a bit
about what you do?
:19:39
	I run a comprehensive
American values program.
:19:46
	ln which we discuss...
:19:49
	ethical situations...
:19:50
	sex education,
drug awareness...
:19:54
	What do you say to young people
who look around at the world...
:19:57
	and see that it's become,
you know, like, a...