:17:01
Enough to drive a man insane.
Myron Larabee.
:17:06
Howard Langston.
:17:08
I'm shopping late because
I'm busy at Christmastime.
:17:11
People send Christmas letters...
:17:12
to folks they don't talk to
but once a year,
:17:15
not to mention relatives
sending presents...
:17:17
they're going to send back.
:17:19
How many toiletry kits
does a man need?
:17:21
How about those stupid letters
from kids to Santa?
:17:24
MYRON, WITH CHILD'S VOICE:
'Dear Santa, send me a bike.'
:17:28
No! Your father's been laid off!
:17:29
As if I didn't have
enough pressure,
:17:32
my son wants
some goofy-butt toy,
:17:35
some fruity robot
named Turtle Man.
:17:37
That's Turbo Man.
My son wants one, too.
:17:40
You know it's all a ploy.
:17:44
HOWARD: A ploy?
MYRON: Don't you watch TV?
:17:47
We are being set up
by powerful toy cartels.
:17:50
- Come on.
- These fat cats...
:17:52
use working-class
like me and you.
:17:54
They spend billions of dollars
on TV advertisement,
:17:57
and then they use
subliminal messages...
:18:00
to suck your
children's minds out!
:18:01
I know what I'm talking about.
I went to junior college.
:18:04
I studied psychology.
I know what's going on.
:18:08
Then they make a kid
feel like garbage...
:18:10
because you, the father,
who's working 24-7,
:18:13
delivering mail to make
an alimony payment to a woman...
:18:16
that slept with everybody
at the post office but me!
:18:20
When you get the toy, it breaks
because it's cheap plastic!
:18:25
I'd like to
walk in that office, grab him,
:18:28
and just choke him
until his eye pops out!
:18:34
You shouldn't wear fur.
:18:37
Ugh!
:18:40
MYRON: Back up. I'm first.
Turbo Man, you're mine!
:18:47
MYRON: Move it, move it!
:18:49
MAN: Whoa!
MYRON: Move, move!
:18:56
MYRON: Get out my way!