Armageddon
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:18:00
What about having a life, Harry?
:18:02
The first time I got my period,
Rockhound had to take me
into Taipei for Tampax...

:18:05
and then he had to show me
how to use 'em, Harry.

:18:07
Ho-ho.
:18:09
I ju-- No, l-l
told her how to use it.
I didn't show her, Harry.

:18:14
I was playing with titanium
depth gauges when I should've
been playing with dolls.

:18:18
I mean, I learned about the birds and
the bees from Freddie Noonan's tattoos.

:18:23
Look, I was raised
on roughnecks by you.

:18:25
And now you get all shocked and shaken
when I fall in love with one.

:18:28
- So who's the hypocrite
here, Harry, huh?
- Look at those nice pipes.

:18:31
-Listen to me, Grace.
-No, you listen to me, Harry. I grew up.

:18:35
With the proximity
of the asteroid and no prep time,

:18:39
none of our primary plans can work.
:18:41
Why don't we just send up 150 nuclear
warheads and blast that rock apart?

:18:44
Terrible idea.
:18:46
Was I talkin' to you?
:18:48
This is Dr Ronald Quincy
from Research.

:18:50
Pretty much the smartest man on the
planet. You might wanna listen to him.

:18:53
General, if you consider your target,
:18:55
her composition, her dimensions,
:18:58
her sheer velocity,
:19:00
you could fire every nuke
you've got on her, she'll just
smile at you and keep on coming.

:19:05
You should know that
the president's scientific advisors...

:19:07
are suggesting that a nuclear blast
could change this asteroid's trajectory.

:19:10
I know the president's chief scientific
advisor. We were at M.I.T. together.

:19:15
And, in a situation like this,
[ Clears Throat ]

:19:17
you really don't wanna take
the advice from a man who got
a C-minus in astrophysics.

:19:21
The president's advisors
are wrong. I'm right.

:19:26
Hitting the rock from
the outside won't do the job.

:19:29
Imagine a firecracker
in the palm of your hand.

:19:32
You set it off. What happens?
Burn your hand, right?

:19:36
You close your fist around
the same firecracker and set it off--

:19:40
poof-- your wife's gonna be opening your
ketchup bottles the rest of your life.

:19:44
Are you suggesting that we blow
this thing up from the inside?

:19:46
- That's exactly what I'm saying.
- How?

:19:48
[ Sighs ]
We drill.

:19:51
We bring in the world's best
deep-core driller.

:19:53
Harry, get up here.
We're takin' a hit.

:19:55
- Get A.J. up here!
- Come on!

:19:58
- Oh, shit!
- [ Yelling ]

:19:59
Send another pipe down! Right now!

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