Simon Birch
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:09:01
Let's click on the turnstiles
of our wax files.

:09:04
This one goes out
to our Gravestown Tigers.

:09:11
Baseball is a lot
like life for a 12-year-old.

:09:14
You spent most of your time
waiting for the excitement to begin...

:09:17
only to discover later
that it's already past you by.

:09:20
Think out there, boys.
Okay? When you're out there, think!

:09:23
- I was just thinking.
- Yeah?

:09:27
- Last year we played
in the squirt league, right?
- Uh-huh.

:09:30
- And this year we're in the peewees.
- So?

:09:33
Do they want us
to play baseball or urinate?

:09:39
Anyway,
I was just thinking.

:09:42
My mom got pregnant
during her senior year at high school.

:09:46
The fact that she refused
to divulge my father's identity...

:09:49
- upgraded it to a full-fledged scandal.
- Hi, Joe!

:09:54
Hi, Miss Wenteworth.
:09:56
Hi, Simon.
:09:58
How's my little doll?
:10:01
Your mother has the best breasts
of all the mothers.

:10:03
- Yeah.
- And she smells the best too.

:10:06
- I know.
- She's so sexy that...

:10:08
sometimes I forget
she's someone's mother.

:10:10
- Okay! Okay!
- I was just being honest.

:10:13
Well, what if I said
the same thing about your mother?

:10:15
I'd have you committed.
:10:17
Nobody knew her secret. Not even me.
:10:19
- And I wouldn't know it to this day,
if it wasn't for Simon Birch.
- Ooh!

:10:23
Birch, on deck.
:10:32
Go get 'em, Simon.
:10:42
You go, Simon.
You'll be wonderful.

:10:45
Simon loved baseball.
:10:47
I'm not sure why.
:10:51
He rarely got to play and when he did,
he was ordered not to swing.

:10:54
His strike zone
was minuscule.

:10:57
Holy shit!
:10:59
Ha! Look at this kid.

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