:04:01
Good job, lady.
You were shakin'.
:04:05
It is gonna be fun today.
:04:08
The best man's gonna come up
and say a few words...
:04:12
so let's put our hands together
for the groom's brother David.
:04:19
All right, Dave.
:04:32
When my brother Harold
asked me to be the best man...
:04:37
I was like,
"Whoa, of course, man...
:04:42
"because you've always
been there for me".
:04:46
Like when I was in rehab...
:04:51
and like the time
I couldn't find my car.
:04:56
'Cause, Harold, he's always been
the dependable one.
:05:00
I've always been
the screwed-up one. Right, Dad?
:05:07
"Why can't you
be more like your brother?
:05:11
"Harold would never
beat up his landlord".
:05:16
He's drunk as shit.
:05:23
But...
:05:25
a little news flash, Pop.
:05:28
Harold ain't so perfect.
:05:32
Remember that time
in Puerto Rico...
:05:34
when we picked up those two...
:05:38
I guess they were prostitutes,
but I don't remember paying.
:05:41
How about that?
:05:45
Terrific.
:05:46
I'm a person, too,
Pop, goddamn it!
:05:50
You're a moron!
:05:55
The best man, everybody.
:05:57
Best man. The better man.