Election

1:06:48

Tracy: Dear LordJesus,

1:06:50

I do not often speak with You
and ask for things,

1:06:53

but now I really must insist

1:06:54

that You help me
win the election tomorrow,

1:06:56

because I deserve it
and Paul Metzler doesn't,

1:06:59

as You well know.

1:07:01

I realize that
it was Your divine hand

1:07:03

that disqualifiied Tammy Metzler,

1:07:04

and now I'm asking
that You go that one last mile

1:07:07

and make sure to put me
in offiice where I belong

1:07:10

so that I may carry out
Your will on Earth

1:07:12

as it is in heaven. Amen.

1:07:15

Tammy: Dear God,

1:07:16

I know I don't believe in You,

1:07:18

but since I'll be starting
Catholic school soon,

1:07:20

I thought I should
at least practice.

1:07:22

Let's see, what do I want?

1:07:24

I want Lisa to realize
what a bitch she is

1:07:27

and feel really bad and apologize

1:07:29

for how she hurt me

1:07:30

and know how much
I still love her.

1:07:32

In spite of everything,
I still want Paul

1:07:35

to win the election tomorrow,

1:07:36

not that cunt Tracy.
Oh, and I also want

1:07:39

a really expensive
pair ofleather pants,

1:07:42

and someday I want to be

1:07:43

really good friends
with Madonna. Love, Tammy.

1:07:47

Paul: Dear God, thank You

1:07:49

for all Your blessings.

1:07:50

You've given me so many things,

1:07:52

Iike good health,
nice parents, a nice truck,

1:07:56

and what I'm told
is a large penis,

1:07:58

and I'm very grateful.

1:07:59

But I sure am worried
about Tammy.