1:07:01
It's boring."
So I decided to date again.
1:07:05
I only allow myself to have crabs on
weekends. So thank God it's Friday.
1:07:12
Are you going to eat your bread?
1:07:14
He's cute and he didn't bring me
to a cheap restaurant. Okay. Bye.
1:07:20
My dad.
He just likes to check in.
1:07:24
State requires that I wear a tracking
device or I violate my parole.
1:07:31
I know this is a little bit silly,
but do I have any food in my teeth?
1:07:37
As you can see,
my choices were limited.
1:07:41
So one day I bumped into Cyrus
and we started having a fling.
1:07:46
Trouble is she had this thing
about Barnes and Noble bookstores.
1:07:53
But I could never bring myself
to make her pancakes.
1:07:58
I heard she went back to MIT.
1:08:01
So, I thought going to the Culinary
Institute would turn my life around.
1:08:07
But food never tasted
like it used to do.
1:08:12
I started cutting class.
1:08:15
I flunked the pop quiz
on fish fileting.
1:08:19
And pretty soon
I was a culinary drop-out.
1:08:27
With nothing else to do, I was forced
to go bar-hopping with Hicks.
1:08:37
I'd sure like to unfold
her napkin, you know?
1:08:42
-God, I'm feeling grabby tonight.
-Last night wasn't enough?
1:08:48
I didn't arrive.
1:08:50
-You didn't arrive?
-No, I was too wasted.
1:08:55
-Was she older or younger?
-Sixty.
1:08:59
-You slept with a 6O-year old woman?
-When you work in physical therapy...