The Next Best Thing
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:10:00
- Keep the bottle head up.
- More bass. Put more bass in.

:10:02
Hear that? Make you wanna grow
a big-ass Afro, huh?

:10:07
- Hi, hi.
- What the--

:10:09
Stop!
:10:10
Robert, what the hell
are you doing here?

:10:12
I haven't come here to argue.
I just want the keys.

:10:14
You know what I'm talking about.
The house keys. Hand 'em over!

:10:17
- I don't have your keys.
- No more excuses, poopsie.

:10:19
Poopsie?
:10:21
I haven't got time for the pain.
:10:23
Hey, Kev, look like
your bitch need a shave.

:10:25
- Actually, I wax.
- He's not my bitch, okay?

:10:27
-So what you sayin'? You the bitch, Kev?
-I'm not anybody's bitch, all right?

:10:31
- Abbie put you up to this, didn't she?
- Oh, A-Abbie-- Abbie.

:10:33
Is that what you're calling me
this month to your chocolate-covered
peanut gallery?

:10:36
- Yo Mama!
- This is precisely why...

:10:39
I'm leaving him, everyone.
:10:41
This double life
is tearing my roots apart.

:10:43
Just give me the keys, please,
to Abbie's house.

:10:46
- Yeah, give this punk the keys, Kev.
- You left a few things at home.

:10:51
- Toothbrush. Ha!
- A toothbrush?

:10:53
- A girl's best friend: knee pads!
- Knee pads!

:10:56
- Nair.
- Nair!
- Kevin!

:10:59
Oh, one more thing.
You forgot these.

:11:02
- Oh, man!
- You slut!

:11:06
Want the keys? Huh?
:11:08
Get the hell outta here!
:11:11
Kev, those rubbers
wasn't even lubricated, dog.

:11:14
Oh, look what you
made happen, Kev.

:11:16
- You're not gonna even
walk her to the car?
- Oh, that's funny.

:11:19
Go suck it down, Kev!
:11:25
Come on. Hurry up.
Get in the car.

:11:29
Yes! Hurry up!
:11:32
Won'tstop
Neverunderestimate us

:11:34
- Can'tstop
- Thanks, Mary.

:11:35
You're welcome, Muriel.
:11:37
- Neverunderestimate us
- Drive!

:11:40
- Ooh! This is madness!
- Can'tstop

:11:47
I'm so glad you guys are here.
:11:48
If it weren't foryou,
I'd feel like I was crashing
my own boyfriend's funeral.

:11:56
Who are the pallbearers?
:11:57
Ugh. A grab bag ofJoe's relatives
he couldn't relate to.


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