Life Without Dick
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:05:07
Sorry. I'm so sorry.
:05:11
Sorry.
:05:14
Hello, 91 1 ?
:05:16
I just shot my boyfriend,
but it was an accident.

:05:20
I really don't think
thatjail time is a good idea.

:05:23
That's not right.
:05:28
Hello, is this 91 1 ?
:05:30
Oh, hi.
:05:33
Hey, listen, a stranger
just broke into my house...

:05:36
and got my purse
and took my gun out ofmy purse...

:05:38
and shot my boyfriend
and hid him in the basement.

:05:43
That's not gonna work.
:05:59
- Hello.
- Mom, I have to talk toyou.

:06:02
Well, I have to talk toyou too.
:06:05
What I have to tell you
is very important.

:06:07
Well, Colleen,
mine is important too.

:06:11
- Is that Colleen?
- Ofcourse it's Colleen.

:06:13
Ijustsaid, ''Well, Colleen. ''
:06:15
Tell her to watch out
for dust mites.

:06:20
I have to tell you something...
:06:23
very important about Dick.
:06:25
Listen, sweetie. I just sentyou
some clippings from magazines.

:06:29
You know, different hairstyles.
:06:31
Some ofthem wouldlook
justdarlingonyou.

:06:34
Oh, and some,
you know, diets too.

:06:37
Tell her about the dust mites.
:06:40
Sweetie, haveyou heard
from Peter recently?

:06:43
No, Mother, I haven't
heard from Peter...

:06:46
because he married my former
best friend, Pamela Grinder.

:06:49
Remember?
:06:51
Well, maybe ifyou wore
your hair differently--

:06:55
All right, well,
thanks for the advice.

:06:57
Bye.

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