National Lampoon Presents Dorm Daze
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:02:00
There should be plenty
if you want some later.

:02:02
- Okay. Good luck.
- See you.

:02:03
- You all right? Go!
- Wish me luck!

:02:11
Last final.
Aced it, baby. Aced it!

:02:15
Party time!
:02:16
It all starts now.
:02:18
Hey, I'm trying to study.
:02:20
Booker, you finished
your last final yesterday.

:02:22
I'm getting a head start
on next semester.

:02:24
Wrong kind of head, little brother,
because today, you become a man.

:02:27
No longer--get up--will you
look at yourself and see a little boy.

:02:32
No longer will you cry in the shower
knowing no matter how hard you scrub,

:02:36
you cannot rid yourself
of that most heinous of afflictions.

:02:43
- Virginity!
- I don't cry in the shower.

:02:46
Settle down.
:02:47
This is all a very complicated process,
so pay attention.

:02:50
Chicks won't have sex with a guy unless
the guy's bagged at least four other chicks.

:02:54
Girls are shallow and want
a guy with experience--like me.

:02:58
How am I supposed
to have sex with a girl

:03:00
if girls won't have sex with a guy
who hasn't had sex?

:03:03
The same way all men have been
doing it for thousands of years.

:03:05
- The on-ramp to manhood--whores.
- I'm not going to a hooker!

:03:09
- Don't you wanna be cool like me?
- You're not cool.

:03:10
- Yes, I am.

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