Bad News Bears
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:17:00
- Yeah.
- Where are we going?

:17:02
I already told you,
to the batting cages.

:17:05
You guys swing like Helen Keller
at a piƱata party.

:17:07
I'm gonna do something about it.
:17:10
- Tell us about the majors, coach.
- You were in the majors?

:17:13
Yeah, for a little while.
:17:15
Hey, Lupus, don't lean against
that door, bud, all right?

:17:18
Yes, I was recently perusing
baseballstats.org

:17:22
and it said Mr. Buttermaker played
pitcher for the Seattle Mariners

:17:25
for two-thirds of an inning in 1984.
:17:27
Two-thirds, that's it?
:17:29
Well, it was the end of the season,
you know, September call-ups.

:17:31
Yes, his lifetime ERA was 36.
:17:34
That's lame.
:17:36
Yeah, well I closed
the inning out, okay.

:17:38
There's only a few thousand guys ever
set foot on a major-league mound,

:17:41
and I'm one of them. What have
you done with your life, smart-ass?

:17:45
Why didn't you stay?
:17:47
Well, I was gonna come back,
but I had a little incident.

:17:49
I punched an ump.
Really just a bitch-slap.

:17:52
How the hell was I supposed to know
he was a bleeder?

:17:54
Fourteen stitches.
Like that means something.

:17:58
They used to stitch everything up,
goddamn it. It was like the Dark Ages.

:18:03
I got stitches on my foot.
:18:05
Oh, yeah?
Well, I'm in a damn wheelchair.

:18:14
Anyway, after that,
I blew off a few offers,

:18:17
you know, Japan, shit like that.
You know what I mean?

:18:24
Shit.
:18:27
What the hell?
:18:28
Is he okay?
:18:31
Lupus.
:18:34
Lupus?
:18:37
Lupus?
:18:40
Lupus.
:18:42
What the hell are you grinning at?
:18:45
You scared the hell out of me.
Don't be leaning on the door.

:18:53
How many are in there?
:18:55
The infestatiors quite advanced.
:18:58
All right, pull the pin. Throw it.

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