:40:01
There was stiII a way out.
:40:04
But not any Ionger. I'm in a bIind aIIey.
:40:07
I've onIy myseIf to bIame, you might say.
:40:09
l should have been more on my guard,
kept everything to myself...
:40:13
fought it out in my own heart.
:40:15
But it all came too suddenly
for me to give myself the blame...
:40:20
for not having kept my nerves under control.
:40:23
l went to your place and wrote you a note...
:40:26
and in doing so relinquished control.
:40:29
From that moment...
:40:31
someone else was half-aware
of my misfortune...
:40:34
and, more importantly,
of the stain on my honour...
:40:38
and with this discussion,
that person is now fully aware.
:40:42
And since there is such a person...
:40:45
there's no going back.
:40:49
I wouIdn't say that.
:40:52
I don't Iike using trite phrases...
:40:56
but I know no better way of putting it.
:40:59
l'll be as silent as the grave.
:41:02
That's what people always say.
:41:05
But there's no such thing as secrecy.
:41:08
You may be the soul of discretion...
:41:11
but you know about it...
:41:13
and the fact that you express
your consent and understanding...
:41:17
does not save me from you.
:41:20
l am, and l remain...
:41:22
from this moment on,
an object of your sympathy.
:41:26
Every word you hear me say to my wife
is subject to your control.
:41:31
lf my wife talks about being faithful...
:41:34
or, as women do...
:41:36
sits in judgement over others...
:41:38
l shan't know where to look.
:41:41
Or suppose l urge...
:41:43
reconciliation in some
everyday affair of honour...
:41:46
because no ill intent is involved.
:41:49
A smile will cross your face...
:41:51
or it will twitch, at least...
:41:54
and in your heart you'll say,
''Good old lnnstetten...
:41:59
''has a passion for analysing
the chemical content of all insults...