:19:00
"You know what really make me mad,
though, is afterwards, right?
:19:03
"You done all the shitting you
gonna do for the whole day, right?
:19:06
"You finish shitting and you flush
the toilet and wait a second
:19:09
"and one chunk come back.
:19:13
"What does that chunk want?"
:19:16
That was my act.
My mother sit there shocked.
:19:18
lf you don't speak English,
you can't hear that bit.
:19:21
All you hear is "shit, ass, shit, shit."
:19:23
I got a lot of foreigners
that come over.
:19:25
People from other countries have seen
my films and come over to the U.S.,
:19:28
because New York
is a tourist place,
:19:30
and they get HBO
and they catch Delirious
:19:32
and they can't speak English
and try to do my act
:19:34
and all they got is the curses.
:19:36
I got foreigners from all over
walking up, going:
:19:38
"Eddie Murphy! Fuck you!
:19:46
"Fuck you, Eddie.
:19:49
"I know you. I see you on television.
:19:54
"You're the 'fuck you' man, right?
:19:57
"I love it. Suck my dick, huh?
:20:01
"Suck it, you black motherfucker.
:20:05
"I love it. The best motherfucker.
The 'fuck you' man."
:20:11
Made me stay in the house, man.
Almost got married last year.
:20:16
Don't you "ooh" and "aah".
:20:18
Got to get married in the '80s.
I read the papers.
:20:20
I said, "Fuck this, I'm getting out."
:20:22
Hey, you know, read.
You can catch some shit.
:20:25
You can't just keep messing around
like you used to.
:20:28
Eventually, your dick will fall off.
:20:31
Remember...? Remember, like,
VD in the '60s?
:20:33
That shit don't just sting no more.
Every time they cure something,
:20:36
it come back stronger.
VD is new and improved now.
:20:40
They got dudes in the doctor's office
with symptoms like, "Excuse me, doc,
:20:43
"what does it mean when you
go to the bathroom
:20:47
"and fire shoot out your dick?"
:20:54
"Let me get this right.
So you're getting a burning sensation
:20:57
"when you urinate?"