:27:03
"You got a lot of motherfucking nerve
by asking me to sign a contract.
:27:06
"There's nothing a man can do
for me that I can't do for myself.
:27:09
"You got a whole lot of...
I love you.
:27:11
"Telling me to sign a contract
to show that I love you?
:27:13
"lf I need something, I can go to my
family. My family takes care of me."
:27:16
And men hear all that shit
and we be like this, "OK.
:27:22
"We don't need no contract."
:27:23
And you don't get a contract
and get married without one
:27:26
and the shit don't work out
and you break up a year later.
:27:29
She's sitting around
in the kitchen by herself, mad,
:27:32
trying to figure out a way
to get even with your ass.
:27:35
"I can't believe that motherfucker
did this to me!
:27:37
"After all the shit I did...
:27:39
"All the things I did for that
motherfucker, he do this to me?
:27:42
"Him and his fat bitch
can kiss my ass!
:27:43
"I don't give a shit about
either one of them.
:27:46
"I don't want shit from him or her
and I don't care.
:27:48
"You know something? You know
what I should...? You know...?
:27:54
"Half!
:27:56
"I'll take half his shit!"
:27:59
And they'll get it.
:28:01
They'll get half your money,
your house, your car, alimony,
:28:05
child support and your children.
:28:07
You will be on the cover
of the Enquirer like this:
:28:11
So be careful!
:28:14
I started having nightmares.
:28:16
I was waking up in the middle
of the night like this: "Half!"
:28:23
Because I'm into American women.
I like American women.
:28:25
I got a friend
got a Japanese girlfriend.
:28:28
And Japanese women are
the most docile women on the planet.
:28:31
They're real... They're real timid,
timid, timid, timid women.
:28:34
I walked in the house
and his friend, Japanese girl,
:28:36
bowed to me when I walked in.
:28:38
I said, "What's wrong
with your wife's back and shit?"
:28:40
He said, "That's a Japanese thing.
They bow."
:28:42
And I was like,
"Miss, did you decorate the house?"
:28:44
She looked at her husband,
he did like this:
:28:46
"You may speak."
And she spoke.
:28:48
And I was like, "Now, that's
pussy control for you, there."
:28:54
You know, because I'm used
to American women saying:
:28:56
"You don't own me."
:28:58
"Hey, baby, where you going?"