Good Morning, Vietnam
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:20:01
Dreiwitz, I've assigned you
to cover the PC.

:20:04
- He likes to say PC
instead of press conference.
- And if you do hap...

:20:06
- The lieutenant loves to abbreviate.
- And if you do... And if you do...

:20:09
And if you do happen to speak with him,
please be polite and to the point
at all times.

:20:15
- Affirmative, sir.
- "Affirmative, sir." Good.

:20:19
Okay. Who do we have slated
for live entertainment in November?

:20:25
Well, we originally wanted Bob Hope,
but it turns out he won't come.

:20:29
- Why not?
- He doesn't play police actions,
just wars.

:20:33
Bob likes a big room, sir.
:20:37
- That is not funny!
- How 'bout if it escalated?

:20:47
- How about if what escalated?
- The Vietnam conflict.

:20:51
The Vietnam conflict.
:20:53
We are not going to escalate
a whole war just so we can
book a big-name comedian!

:20:58
We can get Tony Bennett
or Trini Lopez.

:21:00
I got it. Jerry Vale.
He closes the Copa on the 18th.

:21:04
- Is that date firm?
- I got it from my niece.

:21:07
Oh, come on. This is not the Catskills.
Get somebody good. Get The Beach Boys.

:21:10
- Don't dick around here.
- Oh, we tried, but their agent says
they're still on the beach...

:21:13
and they won't be off the sand
till November! Ba-da-bing!

:21:16
Uh, well, didn't somebody
wearing my uniform and bearing
a striking resemblance to myself...

:21:21
just say that that kind of music
was inappropriate?

:21:24
Sorry, sir.
I haven't been to sleep.

:21:28
The former VP
will be here on Friday.

:21:31
I expect every minute of the VP's PC
to be taped and broadcast...

:21:34
within 12 hours of his arrival.
:21:36
Something funny, Garlick?
Well, perhaps you'd like to
share it with the rest of us.

:21:40
No, sir. The former vice president
is a delight, sir.

:21:44
Excuse me, sir. Seeing as how
the VP is such a VIP...

:21:47
shouldn't we keep the PC on the QT,
'cause if it leaks to the VC...

:21:50
he could end up an MIA,
and then we'd all be put on KP.


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