:34:01
- Perfect dozen ?
- Each egg has to be perfect.
:34:03
- The quest isn't going well ?
- Obviously not.
:34:06
- Look at all the cartons
that didn't make the grade.
- Why doesn't he mix and match ?
:34:09
- l told him that, and he yelled at me.
- What'd he say ?
:34:12
He said
it was important to have standards.
He says no one has any pride anymore.
:34:15
It's not like
you laid the eggs yourself.
:34:17
I give him five more minutes.
After that, I'm calling the cops.
:34:20
I don't need this.
I'm not even supposed to be here today.
:34:25
Two packs of cigarettes.
:34:29
- I'm as puzzled as you.
- I've actually seen it before.
:34:33
- You know him ?
- No, but l know the behavior.
:34:36
- Let me guess. He's looking
for the perfect carton of eggs ?
- [ Randal ] How'd you know ?
:34:39
- I'll bet you a million dollars
he's a guidance counselor.
- [ Dante ] Why do you say that ?
:34:43
I saw it happen in Food City,
Like, last year. Different guy, though.
:34:47
Stock boy said he'd been looking through
cartons of eggs for half an hour,
:34:50
doing all sorts
of endurance tests and stuff.
:34:53
I asked him why nobody ever called
the manager, and he said it happens...
:34:55
two, three times a week, sometimes more.
:34:58
- Get out of here.
- No, l kid you not.
:35:00
They call it shell shock. Seems to
only happen with guidance counselors.
:35:04
They used to make a big deal of it,
but they just let it go now...
:35:06
because they always pay
for whatever they break,
and they never bother anybody.
:35:10
Why guidance counselors ?
:35:12
If your job was as meaningless
as theirs, wouldn't you go crazy too ?
:35:15
- Come to think of it, my guidance
counselor was kinda worthless.
- See ?
:35:18
It's important to have a job
that makes a difference, boys.
:35:21
That's why l manually masturbate caged
animals for artificial insemination.
:35:28
Go your own way
:35:31
You can call it
another lonely day