:04:04
Oh, yes.
:04:08
Round of applause for our emcee,
Dave. Give it up for him.
:04:13
Where you been? We've been sitting
here with our tongues hanging out.
:04:17
I'm fucking melting here.
Look at me.
:04:19
Getting them their fucking drinks.
She's driving me fucking mad, she is.
:04:23
I was just telling him
about that Deborah.
:04:26
-Remember Deborah?
-Deborah?
:04:27
-That fucking sort. Right good-looking.
-Oh, the bank bird.
:04:32
-So, anyway, I get to the door, right?
-That's if it's true.
:04:39
I ring the bell, right?
I'm standing there, I'm waiting, right?
:04:42
There's a geezer standing there
in a see-through woman's negligee.
:04:46
He's got all the fucking tackle
hanging out. He's stark naked.
:04:50
-He's got a great big la-di-da.
-Yeah, one at both ends.
:04:54
Yeah, but the cigar was bigger.
:04:56
He says,
"Hello, you must be Mark.
:04:58
My wife, Deborah, told me about you.
Drinks are in there, party's in there."
:05:03
And he's pointed at these doors.
:05:05
What you call them doors
in the fucking cowboy films?
:05:09
-Them doors.
-Louver doors.
:05:10
Louver doors, right?
So all of a sudden I'm stand--
:05:14
-Very sorry, mate.
-All right, mate.
:05:17
Cunt. Wants to sit in me fucking lap,
doesn't he?
:05:23
Anyway, so I go through
these louver doors...
:05:25
...and you ain't gonna believe
what I've seen.
:05:29
There's eight or nine couples,
all bang at it. It's an orgy.
:05:33
It's only turned out to be
a fucking orgy.
:05:36
There's assholes going up and down,
there's tits everywhere.
:05:39
It's like watching a bluey, right?
I'm thinking:
:05:42
"I'm having some of this,
this is a bit of me."
:05:44
So I strip down, right?
Strip down to me boxer shorts...
:05:47
...sat down on the sofa, picked up an
album cover, and I start rolling a joint.
:05:51
Tell him about the bird
bending over with the big Earthas.
:05:55
There's a bird standing next to me.
She's leaning over the sofa.
:05:59
She's got the biggest pair of tits
you've ever seen.