:02:00
	thousands of seventeen-year-old
girls like yourselves...
:02:04
	compete around the country
in places like...
:02:07
	beautiful Mount Rose,
Minnesota...
:02:09
	and make it all the way
here to Lincoln, Alabama...
:02:13
	to compete for the title
of American Teen Princess.
:02:17
	So which one of you will it be?
:02:20
	Like sands through the hourglass
so are the "Days Of Our Lives. "
:02:28
	God, Iris, you taped
your shows over it.
:02:31
	I'm sorry.
:02:38
	Now, ladies,
the rest of the tape...
:02:40
	which is now gone forever...
:02:43
	goes on about starting
that great journey...
:02:46
	which we call the American
Teen Princess Pageant.
:02:49
	So any of you young ladies...
:02:51
	who'd like to start
on that journey...
:02:52
	you just come right down here
and sign up.
:02:55
	And, please, help yourself
to some coffee and bars.
:02:59
	Showtime.
:03:02
	Do you think
most people would say...
:03:04
	that teenage beauty pageants
are a good idea?
:03:06
	Oh, yeah, sure.
:03:07
	I know what some of your
big-city, no-bra-wearin'...
:03:09
	hairy-legged
women libbers might say.
:03:11
	They might say that a pageant...
:03:13
	is old-fashioned
and demeaning to the girls.
:03:15
	What's sick is women
dressing like men.
:03:17
	You betcha, Iris.
:03:19
	No, I think you boys
are going to find something...
:03:21
	a little bit different
here in Mount Rose.
:03:22
	For one thing,
we're all God-fearin' folk.
:03:25
	Every last one of us.
:03:26
	And you will not find a
"back room" in our video store.
:03:31
	No, that filth is better
left to the sin cities.
:03:34
	A.k. a. Minneapolis, St. Paul.
:03:57
	Oh, yeah, sure.
:03:59
	Freda, sure.