Death to Smoochy
prev.
play.
mark.
next.

:17:02
I got more emotional investment
in my nail polish.

:17:05
So don't peddle your sap to me.
:17:07
Your job is to smile
and nod your head.

:17:27
Look. I'm not literally comparing
Captain Kangaroo to Jesus Christ.

:17:32
I'm saying that the Captain,
like Christ...

:17:35
...was someone you could
really believe in.

:17:40
With those guys...
:17:41
...it wasn't about the bells and
whistles, it was all about the work.

:17:46
Especially Jesus.
I mean, forget about it.

:17:50
I never saw anybody get
buzzed on orange juice.

:17:54
I'll tell you a secret: Pop
a little liquid alfalfa in it...

:17:58
...it's blastoff time.
:18:01
Let me have a Five Crown.
:18:05
-Hey.
-Smoochy the Rhino.

:18:08
That's me.
:18:09
I'm a big fan.
:18:12
That's the first time anybody
recognized me out of the suit.

:18:16
Burke Bennett.
Kid-show talent agent.

:18:19
-Nice to meet you.
-Nice to meet you.

:18:22
Network goons are like that.
Stokes tried to screw him...

:18:25
...out of merchandising points.
Claimed he had a warehouse full...

:18:29
...of Dicky Dolls that weren't moving.
We're friends for years.

:18:33
I say to him, "Show me the warehouse."
:18:36
I walk out of there
with a check for 100 grand...

:18:40
...Stokes is sitting
with his thumb up his ass.

:18:43
That's a great story, but the thing is,
with me, I don't care about that stuff.

:18:49
I don't care about Smoochy dolls,
chocolate, floor wax.

:18:53
I care about getting
creative input on my own show.

:18:57
You know, this rhino
came from my womb. Okay?


prev.
next.