Van Wilder
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:18:00
Excuse me.
:18:03
I'm looking for information
on a current student here, Van Wilder.

:18:13
Freshman year.
I'll get the others.

:18:15
- Wait. There are more of these?
- Actually, there are many more.

:18:19
It seems Mr. Wilder didn't quite
come out of his shell...

:18:22
until mid-sophomore year.
:18:25
Thanks.
:18:30
It's like this itchy,
rashy burning sensation.

:18:33
And it hurts when l--
:18:37
- Dance?
- When I pee.

:18:40
- You hooked up with a burner.
- Yeah.

:18:42
She seemed like a nice girl,
said it was her first time?

:18:45
Always check the quality of the turf
before you step onto the field.

:18:47
Listen, go to the campus hospital,
see Stu.

:18:50
Tell him Van sent you, and remember--
Don't be a fool. Wrap your tool.

:18:54
Thanks, Van. Thanks a lot.
:18:56
Don't thank me.
Thank penicillin.

:18:59
Crazy kids with their crazy VD.
:19:05
- You must be Van.
- Hi.

:19:08
I'm Gwen Pearson,
staff writer for The Liberator.

:19:13
Okay, look, that old bag
is stronger than she looks.

:19:17
I'm doing a human
interest piece on you.

:19:20
I'm flattered.
I'd love for your piece to be on me.

:19:25
But sadly I don't do interviews.
Never have, never will. I do lunch.

:19:28
My editor did say
this would be a challenge.

:19:30
Van, second date with Emily.
:19:32
Blue. Brings out your eyes. Kid's got
killer eyes, not unlike yourself.

:19:35
- Has anyone told you that before?
- Yes, my boyfriend.

:19:38
Is it true that this is
your seventh year at Coolidge?

:19:40
Carry the two--
Yes, that's correct.

:19:43
So what's your boyfriend's name?
Does he go to school here?

:19:45
- Does he appreciate you?
- That's none of your business.

:19:47
You know what? You're right.
:19:51
His name's Richard.
He's premed.

:19:55
Van, you have a 1:30
with the swim team.

:19:57
On it.
:19:58
- You have an assistant?
- Yes, I do.


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