1:21:02
and that not everything
he had said
1:21:07
about nothing happened
was true.
1:21:10
Peter Panaro
was personally convinced
1:21:13
that my father
had sexually abused me
1:21:15
and nothing I could say
1:21:17
could dissuade Peter
from this notion.
1:21:19
Jesse felt that
if Judge Boklan knew
1:21:24
that he also was a victim
of his father
1:21:28
that she might consider
the plea negotiations
1:21:32
in a more favorable way.
1:21:35
He came up with this strategy.
1:21:37
It was Peter Panaro's
fictionalized story
1:21:39
that he fed to me
1:21:41
and said, "If you say this,
it's gonna look good for you. "
1:21:44
I told him
I wouldn't do it.
1:21:45
I told him, "Jesse, when you
plead guilty in open court
1:21:49
you're gonna have to admit
1:21:50
to this type
of anal sodomy 14 times.
1:21:54
And I'm not gonna
let you do that
1:21:56
unless you can admit it. "
1:21:58
He looked me
right in the eye
1:22:00
always liked to call me
by my name
1:22:01
before he made a statement
1:22:03
and said,
"Peter, I can admit it. "
1:22:07
The only concern
that Peter Panaro had
1:22:10
was that ethically
as a lawyer
1:22:12
he couldn't let
his client go into court
1:22:15
and say something happened
1:22:17
that he knew his client
had told him was a lie.
1:22:27
The private investigator wasn't
coming up with anything helpful.
1:22:30
There was not gonna be
any defense witnesses.
1:22:32
There wasn't any money
to hire experts.
1:22:34
Mom was insistent upon
there not being a trial.
1:22:37
Peter Panaro
wasn't believing me
1:22:39
no matter how many times
I told him nothing happened.
1:22:47
I just ran out of options.
1:22:56
Jesse was a very good baby.