:01:02
When you get that feeling,
:01:04
a cross between delirium tremens
and the seven-year itch,
:01:07
you know that something
will come up any minute.
:01:19
A good nightmare always begins
in a dark cellar with a coffin.
:01:22
A caretaker comes down to see that
all the ghosts are locked up for the night.
:01:30
He'd better keep away from the casket
or he'll be coughin'.
:01:34
But he doesn't care.
You can see how brave he is.
:01:37
So he decides to ask the guy
his name and how he feels.
:01:40
Why, it's Dracula,
the guy who invented necking.
:01:43
The caretaker decides to run out
and have a good fit.
:01:46
He's afraid that Dracula may want
a blood transfusion any minute,
:01:50
but when he tries to go away,
he meets himself coming back.
:01:53
It looks as though
he's having his ups and downs.
:01:55
He acts like Congress
and always ends up where he started.
:01:58
This exercise is good
for water on the knee,
:02:01
water on the brain
and other naval diseases.
:02:03
It is also a good way of enjoying
the jitters without drinking alcohol.
:02:07
The poor fellow is afraid to go to bed,
so he sleeps in a hammock.
:02:11
Dracula wants to start his stuff. He thinks
he's clever, but we see right through him.
:02:17
So the caretaker comes downstairs
with a hatchet.
:02:20
I don't know how he got upstairs,
but anything can happen in a nightmare.
:02:24
Dracula was a big cheese,
so he always had mice around him.
:02:28
So he hits Dracula in the coffin.
:02:34
As usual, Dracula rises to the occasion.
:02:39
Now he's got Dracula sore, and
the caretaker hasn't a ghost of a show.
:02:44
The caretaker decides
he might have been seeing things.
:02:47
Maybe his near beer
was nearer than he thought.
:02:51
No, sir, he was right. A guy
with a face like Dracula must be a spook,
:02:55
or he'd have his face lifted. And the worst
of it is, this spook looks screwy.
:02:59
There's nothing screwier
than a screwy spook.