:12:01
Oh, yeah ! Whoo-hoo !
:12:05
I should really warn you,
though, it's been known...
:12:08
to severely affect your decision-making
abilities and lowers your inhibitions.
:12:13
Good. That's the plan.
:12:16
No, that-that's--
Yes, that is the plan.
:12:19
- Did you bring some cash ?
- Why ?
:12:21
- We've got chicks for sale.
- What ?
:12:24
* Hey, now I'm snappy
Got my mojo track**
:12:28
Trust me. I've been goin'
to this school for seven years.
:12:32
And I know the key to
a well-rounded college education...
:12:36
is experimentation.
:12:40
Let me show you.
:12:42
This is an auction.
Remember...
:12:45
you are not buying the girl,
:12:47
you are buying her company, and no way
does a sale constitute sexual relations.
:12:52
-[ Groaning ]
-I know, I know. Believe me, I've tried.
:12:56
Anyway, without further ado, let's
Introduce you to our first... person.
:13:00
- Laura !
- [ Applause, Cheering ]
:13:03
Laura's from Long Island. Her favorite
coloris blue. She likes the outdoors.
:13:07
She loves good seafood.
Okay, let's start the opening bidding
at five dollars.
:13:11
Three dollars and fifty cents.
:13:12
- Good God, moneybags.
She's not a Happy Meal.
-[Laughing]
:13:17
- Five dollars.
- Okay, we've got five. Do I hear ten?
:13:20
- Ten bucks.
- [ Auctioneer Calling ]
Who's got fifteen ?
:13:24
- Fifteen bucks for
a lovely evening with Laura.
- Fifteen dollars.
:13:28
Okay, we got 15. Who can beat 15 ?
Going once, going twice.
:13:32
Sold... to the captain.
:13:38
There you are.
:13:41
- Hey, what's going on?
- Not much.
:13:43
- You look great.
- Thank you.
:13:46
You're welcome.
:13:48
Listen, Jacob's here,
and he's a total psycho.
:13:51
Can you go outbid him?
:13:54
You know what,
I didn't bring that much money.
:13:57
You don't understand.
He's obsessed with me.