:43:02
Fuck!
:43:03
- You need therapy.
- Hush, now.
:43:07
The way I see it, with chicks,
:43:10
there's really only two possible things
that could happen.
:43:12
Either they won't sleep with you,
and then there's no need to call them again,
:43:17
or they do sleep with you, and then
there's no need to call them again.
:43:21
This is what I don't get. How can someone
be such a complete asshole all the time
:43:25
and get as many women
as you do?
:43:27
That's a good question.
:43:31
- Amy! Serena! Calvin needs our help.
- No.
:43:32
- Amy! Serena! Calvin needs our help.
- No.
:43:34
- No, I don't need help.
- Shh, shh.
:43:36
Women like assholes,
am I right?
:43:38
- Well, I agree that you're an asshole.
- Okay.
:43:41
"A", fuck you.
"B", just answer the question.
:43:45
Well, okay. Girls like assholes,
not women.
:43:49
What women are attracted to
is self-confidence.
:43:52
Yes, and we absolutely
fucking hate insecurity.
:43:55
Yes! The more insecure you are
the more you ask, "Is something wrong?"
:43:58
- "Is everything okay?"
- "What are you thinking about?"
:44:00
"What's wrong?"
And the more you do that, Calvin,
:44:02
the more it becomes
this self-fulfilling prophecy.
:44:05
You just need to relax
and not worry so much. Okay?
:44:12
Yeah. That makes
a lot of sense.
:44:15
- I'm gonna work on it.
- Yeah. Yeah, you do that.
:44:18
And by the way, take whatever advice
that she gives you with a big grain of salt.
:44:22
Yeah, and take anything that he gives you
with a shot of penicillin.
:44:25
Seriously, Calvin,
do yourself a favor.
:44:29
Unless you're combing the playground
for middle schoolers,
:44:31
don't become an asshole
like Monty.
:44:35
Correct me if I'm wrong,
but haven't I been inside you?
:44:47
- Oh, Monty.
- Oh, me.
:44:49
You wanna brag about your sexual conquests,
you big stud, you?
:44:53
Okay, you know what? Fine.
Let's talk about it.
:44:55
Let me describe Monty's
amazing sexual prowess.
:44:59
He'd barrel into me with that pathetic excuse
for a child's penis.